Our God is good! Though I cannot honestly say that I have done much better at remembering to depend on Him in the normalcy of life, I can say that I do not feel as wretched about it as I did last week. Last week, I was really beating myself up because I could not remember to pray the transitions and to think about God constantly throughout the day. Even though I knew that God forgave me every time and was ready to give me yet another chance, I felt so down because I kept needing another chance. I wanted to get it right and to keep getting it right so that I never needed another chance; when I could not do that, I felt like a failure. This week has been much different, though. God has really changed my perspective. He has changed my perception of Him when I realize I have messed up and that I need another chance. When I turn back to Him, He is not some begrudging father that sighs and says, "Fine, you can have one more chance, but you better not blow it!" No, He has shown me that He is a loving Father who is longing for me to turn back because He wants to give me another chance. He has taken me from feeling like a failure, which I am not, to simply feeling incompetent to perform the task of life, which I am.
2 Corinthians 3:4-6
"Such confidence as this is ours through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant--not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life."
On my own, I am not competent at all, but because of the Spirit of God in me, I am made competent. I am not a failure because I am not under the letter/law, but under grace. (Rom. 6:14) If I was under the law, I would have failed the first time I messed up; there would be no second chance. However, thanks to my precious Jesus, I have thousands of second chances. This doesn't mean that I can take advantage of those chances because I know they will be there. (Rom. 6:1-2) It simply means that I do not have to feel a continual burden of guilt over the chances that I have blown, and they are many. I am reminded of some lyrics from a song:
"This only serves to confirm my suspicions
That I'm still a man in need of a Savior.
I want to be in the Light
As You are in the Light."
I have blown and continue to blow so many chances that I am still in need of a Savior, but I keep striving to walk in the light, as He is in the light. (1 John 1:7) Only through Him and His power at work in my life do I have any hope at all of walking in that light, but through Him and His power at work in my life, I have all the hope in the world.
God, thank You for Your amazing grace. I am continuing to realize more and more that that is not just a song. Your grace is truly amazing. Thank You for how many undeserved second chances You have given and continue to give to me. Remind me constantly of my desperate need for You in every area of my life. Thank You for Your love. You are an awesome God!
"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus." Romans 3:23-24
2 comments:
Our God is a God of second chances! Thank you for reminding me that God wants to give second & third & hundredth chances. We can never thank Him enough for His amazing grace. May we all walk in the Light!
I journaled once and wrote this, "How is it possible to come to believe in something you've always believed in?" This is the nature of our God and the relationship that we share with Him. He is so deep and profound that everything we learned yesterday, He will teach us again today and though we will call it the same thing(like believing that we need a Savior), we will know it so much deeper than what we once understood. The mystery of it is that the depth of the understanding we have today, will pale in comparison to the depth of our understanding in the future as we continue to let Him teach us.
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