Friday, March 21, 2008

*Porcelain Heart*


I'm sorry I didn't get to post last week. I was, regrettably, preoccupied with last minute school projects and stuff like that the first part of the week. The second half of the week I was in Durango, Colorado, for the ski trip... However, here I am now with every intention of continuing to depend on my God even as this experiment draws to a close.

The ski trip was a real eye opener for me. First of all, the majestic mountains. I'd been to Colorado before, but it had been awhile and I'd obviously forgotten just how beautifully breathtaking God's hand crafted mountains are. The way they radiated God's awesome power was incredible. It made me once again realize what a...truly indescribable God we serve. And it made me think, why wouldn't I want to be totally dependent on Him? I know why I'm not dependent 24/7, I get in the way, but I do know that even as this experiment draws to an end I want to totally depend on God and to continue to grow in my relationship with Him.

Also, for those of you that don't know, my picture here is currently a little deceiving. I don't quite look like this, although I'm getting there, but during the ski trip I had an accident. All I can say is that the Lord was watching over me. I was going pretty fast on my skis, maybe too fast, on a rather steep hill and I came to an area that said "no jumping". Well, by the time I had read the sign, which wasn't very (for lack of a better word) jump-out-at-you-ish in the first place, I found that I had no time to try and stop myself, or so I thought. So, on I sped until I came to small drop off right past the "no jumping" sign. Into the air I flew, and with no where else to go but down and with no idea how to land a jump...you can guess what happened. My face pretty quickly and very forcefully became acquainted with the ice. I began to rise from the ground when I looked around me and saw blood all over the ground. "Is that mine?" I thought. From that point on I was in a daze, and several parts of this I don't even remember. But I've been told that almost immediately a doctor who happened to be skiing by stopped and looked me over and a ski instructor came by and helped out too. Also, I was blessed to have a good majority of our group near enough to see it happen and to quickly get help. My injuries could have been a lot worse. I scraped by with a bruised and bloody nose, a few scratches on my face, a punctured lip, and a black eye. I could have easily broken something and even worse...
I can't help but think that with the height of the fall that I took...well, let's just say that that's the closest to death I've ever come and it really gets you thinking. It makes me realize just how much we depend on God sometimes whether we even mean to or not. We are so small and relatively insignificant yet He loves us and wants us to choose to depend on Him. He doesn't give us anything we can't bear and in reality depending on Him, even though it's hard, is a blessed opportunity that He gives us. Sometimes, especially when it gets really hard and when we fall, He gives us people to stabilize us and pull us back to our feet ( just like he did with the people in my skiing situation). Just so long as we don't start depending on the helpers in place of God, which is easy to do.
As this experiment draws to a close I pray that it will have served its purpose. That I won't have been dependent on it, but my God through it and that I'll continue to depend on God in everything and grow in my relationship with Him.

Abba, I cry out with all of my heart. I pray that you'll be with me and with my fellow brothers and sisters that have been through this experiment as it draws to a close. I thank you for the opportunity it presented and for the impact it can potentially have on our lives as a whole. I pray that we will continue to pursue a relationship with you and that as we do so we will remember to totally depend on you, our Rock and Redeemer.

Luke 10:41-42 "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

3 comments:

~Silver Lining~ said...

I have no doubt that God was watching over you during that ski trip. I'm glad you're okay, friend. He did show you some great truths through that experience... Thank you for sharing them w/ us. I am sure that you will continue in your dependence on God though this experiment is drawing to a close.

Cindy Yeats said...

I loved the way you said you hoped you are dependent on God and not on the experience....it is easy to depend on the experience, as it gives people accountability to each other. Thank-you for realizing that and for truly wanting God to be glorified by this experience. By the way, I'm glad God picked you up while you were skiing. Did you feel the brush of angels wings? Your Mom :)

Beastlyone said...

We praise God, both for His providing help and for His providing a heightened awareness, yet again, of how dependent we truly are on Him. As we embrace this reality, He is able to lead us and we can begin to experience the life He called us to in the first place.
Thank you for your integrity to your commitment and for your perseverance. Your devotion to your God, expressed in this experiment, certainly encouraged all of us to continue well beyond the 7 weeks. May you be richly blessed as you continue in deepening your dependence on Him.